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"Turn down the thermostat, Leonard, please," Idirected, nodding toward the far wall. He rose and fiddled with thetemperature setting. Meanwhile, I'd peeled off my Polo shirt and my socks.I rose to go to the bedroom to get some shorts, but fell back on the sofa.Luckily, I'd set my coffee mug down. "Oops," I giggled. "Whatcha need, Boss?" "I was gonna go find something cooler to wear, some shorts orsomething," I replied. "I'll get it for you," Leonard suggested. "You don't know what to get. Help me up," I beckoned. Leonardgave me his hand and I grabbed on to it. He pulled me up and got mesteadied. "Thanks," I muttered. He walked beside me, making sure I didn't tip over, but I wasgetting steadier, I thought. We walked into the bedroom together. I bentover and pulled out a middle drawer and kept right on leaning, finallycrashing my head into the top middle drawer. I snapped up and staggeredback. "Fuck! That smarts!" I snarled to myself. Leonard tried valiantly not to laugh. . “Here, hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich” she said.I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers...I love mustard.I had no napkin.I licked it off.It was not mustard.No man ever put a baby down faster.It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding out.With a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my wife said, “Now you know why they call that fancy mustard Poupon”.When you stop laughing, pass it on.This one is from John A.No one believes seniors ... everyone thinks they are senile.An elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired. Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so.
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